Married to a Psychiatrist recalls Dan Prochoda’s life-changing journey, assisted by his psychiatrist wife, of re-evaluating long-held beliefs regarding himself and others, leading to self-awareness, vulnerability, and love.
Prochoda attended college but dropped out to pursue his dream of becoming a police officer and SWAT team member, a job he held for 13 years. After leaving the police department, Prochoda became a mechanical engineer. He married a woman he didn’t love and had a son. By his own admission, he was a disengaged parent, which he now regrets.
The author had attributed his success to three philosophies: Life is tough, so fight for what you want; never give up, and “stay strong and don’t let things bother you.” As a result, Prochoda suppressed his feelings and was judgmental and insecure.
Prochoda believed expressing his feelings would make him “sound like a pussy.” His second wife Fredi used books, conversations and modeling behavior, among other methods, to guide him, teaching him that his beliefs were “intricate defense mechanisms.” Fredi showed him how to drop his defenses and allowed him to experience a happier, more authentic life.
Prochoda’s writing is clear and cohesive. Although the story is largely chronological, flashbacks enhance the narrative. His use of self-deprecating humor lightens the seriousness of his story. Moreover, Prochoda’s unusually raw vulnerability renders him relatable and assures that he’s the hero rather than victim of this memoir.
Prochoda warns that “Reader discretion is advised,” and, indeed, some may find his brand of locker room humor distasteful. Comments such as “Who wants a wife with small tits? Not me!”; calling a woman “Mrs Pudgy Bottoms”; and remarking “I was frolicking about the land of monstrous mammaries like a horny little elf” may be off-putting.
Nevertheless, readers will likely identify with Prochoda’s dysfunctional behaviors and the emotional bravery he uses to change life-long beliefs. They will also appreciate the honesty and humility he uses to describe his transformation.