In this exceptional memoir, Michael Norkus introduces us to the woman he married, then retraces the life that led him to her, resulting in a hybrid: part coming-of-age story, part love story.

Norkus hopscotches back and forth between his formative years in postwar Germany’s Ruhr Valley and Harvard in the early 1970s, where he courted Andrea, a psychology student. His childhood takes place in a scruffy landscape of factories, coal mines, and bombed-out buildings, populated by parents and grandparents, all memorable. Each contributes something of value to Michael’s developing worldview.

His father, Hans, “had a mind like a Swiss Army knife, sharp and always ready with another function.” His mother, Gisela, prioritized being noble, “even when it costs you. Especially then.” From Hans, “I acquired charm, appetite, invention, and the confidence to move toward the world as if it might open for me.” From Giselle, “I learned ambition, taste, and the dangerous belief that love must be earned.” Tension arises from their dueling visions of what they want their son to become: “…two futures, each persuasive, each carrying part of their unfinished lives.”

At Harvard Business School, his courtship of Andrea is temporarily derailed when someone from her past reappears. Months later, he cold calls her and soon their courtship resumes.

The book’s writing is superior. His father “caught my thoughts, turned them over and sent them back larger and more interesting than before.” When, as a new Navy recruit, he fumbles a rope knot, he writes: “My hands, soft from years of turning book pages, trembled while the other crew members watched.”

It’s easy to forget that English isn’t Norkus’s native tongue, but, interestingly, he writes that there’s one German word that defies translation: durchblick. “It means more than insight and more than clarity. It is the ability to see through confusion, to recognize the pattern beneath events and know what must be done.” Norkus develops that quality in spades.

This memoir of one man’s journey to adulthood and beyond is sure to delight fans of coming-of-age and love stories, as well as anyone who enjoys superb writing.